productive | The Twenty Something Social Recluse

How To Easily Stop Procrastinating

Posted on May 10, 2017 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

Everyone is occasionally guilty of procrastinating! Here are some very easy ways to stop procrastinating.

1. Try Positive Procrastination

If you are feeling super lazy, try using your procrastination to your advantage. You can leverage tasks by writing down a list of things that you need to do – and then start by completing the easiest task. This methodical method means that you are much more likely to start working as you are setting yourself a fairly easy target.

Completing the easiest tasks first means that you can put off the hardest tasks, but it means that you are still working and getting into a productive flow. Once you have finished the first few tasks you will be feeling more productive so it will be easier to complete the difficult tasks, and they will seem less overwhelming as you will already have ticked a few things off your to-do list.

2. Work On Your Mood

If you are in a bad mood you are much more likely to procrastinate, as you are more likely to think that you should improve your mood by doing something fun.

When you are in a bad mood you are less likely to knuckle down and work, as you feel like you deserve to do something that makes you happy. On the other hand, if you are already in a good mood you won’t be thinking about how you can improve your mood, so you are more likely to work.

Try to improve your mood quickly by watching a YouTube video or chatting to a friend – but remember that you are improving your mood so that you can be productive!

3. Break Tasks Up

Big tasks can seem overwhelming, and one of the main causes of procrastination is the feeling of dread. The task seems so big that you know it will take a long time to complete, and this can be disheartening.

If you can relate to this, break the tasks up into smaller, more manageable chunks. Sure, writing a 10 page essay is overwhelming – but writing an introduction isn’t too hard, and you can do that in less than an hour.

What do you think of my suggestions? Do you think that they will help you to procrastinate less? Let me know with a comment!

6 Ways To Deal With Stress

Posted on April 16, 2017 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

Everyone has to deal with stressful situations. This is because sadly stressful situations are just part of life, but thankfully these unpleasant situations are normally few and far between.

However, lots of people go through times that are extremely stressful. When this happens it is hard to eat food, it is hard to sleep and you may even feel physically sick. Over time it can start to feel like stress is the only constant feeling in your life, which is mentally draining.

If you can relate to this, you should spend some time every day actively dealing with the stress in your life.

Here are 6 ways to deal with stress.

1. Start A Stress Diary

Make a note of the date, the time and your location every time you feel stressed out, and rate how stressed you feel out of ten. This will make it easier for you to discover which situations make you feel stressed, so you can start to think about how to avoid that situation. For instance, if you only ever feel stressed when you are with one friend, cut them out of your life!

2. Start A To Do List

A to-do list will make it easier for you to feel like you are in control of your life, and it will make the stressful tasks seem less overwhelming.

3. Shorten Your To Do List

I know this may seem like a contradiction but to-do lists can only help so much – and if you start overburdening yourself with tasks, you will soon feel stressed again. If your to-do list always makes you feel stressed you may need to drop a few things, such as a hobby or an extra commitment. It can be difficult to do less, but it will help if you always feel stressed.

4. Just Focus On One Thing

Choose one task to deal with, and when it is done start thinking about the next task. This can be hard to do but it will reduce your feelings of stress and fear.

5. Say No If You Want To

Some people feel like they have to say yes to everyone, because when they say no they feel like they are letting people down. However, in reality you are letting down yourself if you say yes when you don’t want to!

6. Avoid Using A Crutch

Lots of people turn to a crutch during stressful times, such as smoking, drinking or eating junk food. While I am not personally judging you for having a crutch, it does make it a lot easier to avoid dealing with the stressful situation! This is because people often think “this is stressful, so I’m going to smoke” rather than thinking “this is stressful, so I’m going to try and think of solutions to solve the problem.” Next time you feel stressed spend five minutes thinking about possible solutions before you go to your crutch.

15 Small Things That Make Life Happier

Posted on September 17, 2016 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

Sometimes it is the little things that put us in a great mood. Here are 15 things that make life better!

Finishing work early.
Walking home from work when the weather is beautiful.
Waking up before your alarm goes off, and realizing you still have hours left in bed.
Being praised by your friends, family or boss.
Finding money in your pocket or jacket that you forgot you had.
When the elevator arrives as soon as you press the button.
Listening to a new song that you’ve just discovered on repeat.
Listening to your all-time favorite song on repeat.
When you realize that a show you love is back with a new season.
When you see a happy child or puppy in public.
Having a great hair day.
When you sing/rap the whole song correctly.
When the sun starts shining and you put your winter coat away for a few months.
When a package arrives that you’ve been looking forward to. (Today a big box of Twiglets arrived for me. Day = made!)
When you think of a funny memory and you can’t help but to smile.

What small thing made your life better this week? Let me know with a comment!

10 Quotes About Self-Esteem

Posted on September 9, 2016 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

Self-esteem is an essential part of happiness; without it, you cannot love yourself. Here are 10 quotes that I really like about self-esteem:

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

“You have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” Louise L. Hay

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.” Mark Twain

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” Buddha

“Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” William James

“When you’re different, sometimes you don’t see the millions of people who accept you for what you are. All you notice is the person who doesn’t.” Jodi Picoult

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt

“Our self-respect tracks our choices. Every time we act in harmony with our authentic self and our heart, we earn our respect. It is that simple. Every choice matters.” Dan Coppersmith

“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.” Marilyn Monroe

“It’s not my responsibility to be beautiful. I’m not alive for that purpose. My existence is not about how desirable you find me.” Warsan Shire

Do you think that you have good or bad self-esteem? Let me know with a comment!

Interesting Quotes About The Internet

Posted on September 1, 2016 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

“We are all now connected by the Internet, like neurons in a giant brain.” Stephen Hawking

“The internet could be a very positive step towards education, organisation and participation in a meaningful society.” Noam Chomsky

“If television’s a babysitter, the Internet is a drunk librarian who won’t shut up.” Dorothy Gambrell

“People rely on Wikipedia, and a lot of it is wrong. But because there it is on the Internet, they assume it’s right. Rumor gets printed as fact. We may have lost our critical facility as a nation.” Ben Mezrich

“Oh, Wikipedia, with your tension between those who would share knowledge and those who would destroy it.” John Green

“You are what you share.” Charles Leadbeater

“There’s a danger in the internet and social media. The notion that information is enough, that more and more information is enough, that you don’t have to think, you just have to get more information – gets very dangerous.” Edward de Bono

“The amount of control you have over somebody if you can monitor internet activity is amazing.” Tim Berners-Lee

“Whether in cave paintings or the latest uses of the Internet, human beings have always told their histories and truths through parable and fable. We are inveterate storytellers.” Beeban Kidron

“Don’t believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose.” Douglas Adams

How To Make Friends

Posted on August 16, 2016 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

Do you want to make new friends? If you do, you’re not alone. There are lots of reasons why people want to make friends, such as;

They moved to a new city and they don’t know anyone yet.
Most of their friends moved away for work or University.
They have been in a long term relationship for a long time and they let their friends drop out of the picture.
They feel like they have nothing in common with their current friends.
They used to enjoy being alone, but now they often feel lonely and they would like someone to reach out to.
Whatever your reason, it is easy to make friends if you try. Here 6 tips to help you make new friends.

1. Think About What Kind Of Friends You Want

Before you get out there and try to actively make friends, it can be useful to think about why you need new friends. Do you want someone to go out dancing with at the weekend? Do you want new friends because you are lonely? Do you want a friend you can go to the gym with? This will help you to decide where to look for new friends, so that you find the right people for you.

2. Spend Time With People Who Have Lots Of Friends

One of the easiest ways to meet new people in a relaxed setting is to hang around with someone who already has a lot of friends. Think about your current friends and acquaintances; do you know anyone who is a social butterfly, or who is popular in certain circles?

3. Look For Friends At Work Or School

The people you spend the most time with are normally work colleagues or classmates. Do you already have a connection with one of your classmates or colleagues, such as a shared interest in spots? If so, make the effort to ask them to hang out after work. If that idea makes you feel nervous, you can take the pressure off by organizing a group hangout with your colleagues or classmates.

4. Join Meet Up Pages And Social Networks

Have a look online and see if your city has a meet-up page. Most cities do, and people can join these pages to go to meet-ups with other people with shared interests. For example, my city offers a meet-up page with different categories for different people, including “nights out and drinking”, “book lovers” and “freelancers.”

5. Don’t forget to keep in touch

We often meet people who we get along well with, but we don’t follow up on the connection. If you meet someone who you get along with, make the effort to get their number or add them on social media. This way you can speak further – you could even arrange to meet up.

6. Look Back At Your Old Friendships

Most people have an old friendship that has faded, but they would like to re-start the friendship. Think about your old friends; do you miss any of them? If so, take the initiative to get back in contact with them. It is likely that the other person feels the same way, so this is an easy way to form a friendship.

Do you have any other tips? Let me know with a comment!

How To Spot A Narcissist

Posted on August 8, 2016 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

We’ve all encountered narcissists, but sometimes it isn’t easy to tell that they’re a narcissist until it is too late. Before you know it, you have a co-worker who is always bragging about their life, or a friend who always makes the conversation about themselves.

If you can relate to this, don’t worry. There are often tell-tale signs that give away narcissism – and here they are.

They are likeable to begin with. Narcissists often make great first impressions, coming across as charismatic and friendly – which is probably why they perform so well in job interviews.

They often work in leadership positions. This isn’t because they make better leaders; it is just because they want to lead and rule, so they are more likely to end up in a leadership position than someone else. If they aren’t a leader, you can bet that they wish they were!

They always make the conversation about themselves. They often do this without any clear link – one minute you are talking about work, and the next minute they are talking about their problems/achievements, such as a break up or a promotion.

In all the stories they tell, they are never to blame. The story could paint them as either a winner or a victim – either way, they will still be blameless.

Appearance is important to them. They are more likely to make an effort with their appearance, and they are also more likely to buy high-status items such as an expensive phone or car.

Their past is filled with human wreckage. They may have been through many jobs and break-ups, because narcissists put themselves before everyone else (including their partners.)

They are more likely to take things personally. If you and a narcissistic co-worker disagree about a future project, they will think that you are against them personally, instead of accepting that you both have different ideas.

What do you think about these points? Do you know a narcissist?

15 Inspiring Quotes About Inner Strength

Posted on July 31, 2016 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

“You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” Marcus Aurelius
“I found an inner strength to fight for myself. It was clear that nobody else would.” Tehmina Durrani
“Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” Mahatma Gandhi
“The storm is out there and every one of us must eventually face the storm. When the storm comes, pray that it will shake you to your roots and break you wide-open. Being broken open by the storm is your only hope. When you are broken open you get to discover for the first time what is inside you. Some people never get to see what is inside them; what beauty, what strength, what truth and love. They were never broken open by the storm. So, don’t run from your pain — run into your pain. Let life’s storm shatter you.” Bryant McGill
“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.” Albert Camus
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Mahatma Gandhi
“Anyone can hide. Facing up to things, working through them, that’s what makes you strong.” Sarah Dessen
“Courage is the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you can’t practice any other virtue consistently.” Maya Angelou
“Deep roots are not reached by the frost.” J.R.R. Tolkien
“What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality.” Plutarch
“Self-discovery is the most empowering time of your life, you remember who you are and you become the best version of yourself but what they forget to tell you is, to get to a point of pleasure you must face the pain.” Nikki Rowe
“You are your master. Only you have the master keys to open the inner locks.” Amit Ray
“There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. My courage always rises at every attempt to intimidate me.” Jane Austen
“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be.” Mahatma Gandhi
“Courage isn’t having the strength to go on – it is going on when you don’t have strength.” Napoléon Bonaparte

What do you think about these quotes? Which is your favorite?

4 Ways To Communicate With Stubborn Friends And Family Members

Posted on July 23, 2016 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

Long-term friends and family members are important to everyone. For most people, it feels great knowing that there are people in their lives who will always stick by them – even if they don’t always see eye to eye!

After years and years of knowing someone, you’re bound to disagree on something. This shouldn’t ruin your friendship, but sometimes it can be difficult to disagree with stubborn people without creating tension.

If you can relate to this, here are 4 tips to help you communicate effectively with your stubborn friends and family members.

1. Find Some Common Ground

The more someone disagrees with us, the more stubborn we become. If you want a stubborn person to see where you are coming from, start by finding some common ground. You don’t need to become a pushover and agree with their argument – just put the focus of the conversation on something you will both agree with. For instance, you could say “I know we don’t see eye to eye on this subject, but I hope that we can still go out for food after this conversation. Where do you want to go?” This will help to diffuse the tense situation.

2. Don’t Attack Or Blame

If someone feels backed into a corner, they become emotional and defensive. This means that they are more likely to attack and blame the other person, turning the disagreement into an argument, which is harder to resolve.

Instead of blaming, be honest. For example, instead of saying “You never do anything around the house,” you could say “I did a lot of tidying up last night. I’m really tired now – will you help me tonight?” This will help the other person to see your point, while diffusing the tension.

3. Don’t Focus On Proving Your Point

Sometimes disagreements end up going round and round in circles, because one person is only focused on proving their point. Instead of moving forward, they get sucked in and they won’t stop until the other person sees their point.

Don’t let yourself get caught in this emotional trap. Take a deep breath and focus on communication, rather than blindly proving a point. Ask the other person how they feel, and bring the subject back to the main issue.

4. Try To Listen And Ask Questions

Most arguments are caused because one person can’t see the other person’s perspective. If you want to resolve the issue, you should focus on listening and asking questions so that you can understand the other person’s point. The simple act of you trying to understand them should help them to calm down and relax, so that you can talk honestly and openly without tension.

Do you have any other tips? Let me know with a comment!

25 Ways To Save Money On A Day-To-Day Basis

Posted on July 12, 2016 by The Twentysomething Social Recluse

Carry a bottle of water with you when you go out, so you are less likely to buy an expensive drink.
Try to avoid bulk buying food that is perishable, even if it is on sale. The most expensive food you buy is the food you throw out.
Go vegetarian for a few days a week to save money on meal costs.
Eat leftovers for lunch instead of buying more food.
Switch to energy efficient light bulbs.
Carry less money in your purse while you’re out and about – and try to leave your credit card at home if you aren’t planning on shopping.
Throw a swap party with your friends. You can swap clothes, household items, vouchers – anything you can think of!
Need something new? Consider buying a second hand version to save money.
Don’t watch much TV? Consider getting rid of your TV license and replacing it with Netflix or Hulu.
Only do full loads of laundry.
Check your cell phone plan to see if you could move to a cheaper plan with less offers.
Bike to your destination, instead of driving or getting the bus.
Wash your car at home, instead of paying someone else to do it.
Need to get a taxi? Make sure it’s an Uber as they are often more cost effective.
Replace expensive cosmetic products with a drugstore brand.
Work out at home or the park, instead of the gym to save money on membership fees. There are lots of Youtube tutorials to make sure you are still doing quality exercises.
Stop collecting items, and start selling.
Spend the night at home with your friends, instead of going out. You can still eat great food and drink delicious drinks!
Repair old clothing instead of throwing it away and replacing it.
Make four times as much stew or casserole when you are cooking. Freeze the extra so that you can have leftovers for lunch at work. This also means you have delicious meals ready at home, so you’re less likely to order take out.
Stop using credit cards entirely.
Do a price comparison for your local grocery stores to make sure you get the best deal.
Cancel all of your membership cards that you don’t use.
Wash your hands regularly. Being ill is expensive!
De-clutter your home and sell the items that you don’t need.