Signs Of Verbal Abuse

When many people hear the word abuse, they think about physical abuse such as hitting, slapping or punching. However verbal abuse is more common than physical abuse, and it can be just as damaging as physical abuse.

One of the main problems with verbal abuse is that many people aren’t aware that they are being verbally abused. Instead they believe that the abuse is a reasonable reaction to their own behaviour, which can destroy their confidence and self-esteem over time.

Here are 10 clear signs of verbal abuse.

1. Withholding information. They don’t express their thoughts or feelings with you, but they expect you to share your feelings with them.

2. They constantly counter your points. They often disagree with your opinion and berate you. For instance if you enjoy a song they will say that the song is bad, and then they will make you feel bad for having a different opinion.

3. They undermine your achievements.

4. They trivialise their hurtful comments. If they hurt you they don’t apologise; instead they say that their comments were just a joke. This can make you question if you are being irrational or overreacting.

5. They frequently point out flaws with your character. You are too emotional, too moody, too loud, etc.

6. They blame you for things that aren’t your fault.

7. They control all of your conversations together. They decide what you talk about, and sometimes they even try to tell you what your opinion is.

8. They call you cruel or hurtful names.

9. They threaten you, such as threatening to end the relationship if you don’t change or do what they want.

10. They frequently use gas lighting to make you feel crazy. You will remind them about something that happened in the past and they will immediately deny that the event ever happened.

Can you think of any other signs of verbal abuse? Let me know with a comment!

My Thoughts On Anxiety

Anxiety is a big problem for a lot of people, including myself. Sometimes it can seem like anxiety is an unavoidable part of daily life, and I am starting to think that this is true.

I know this sounds negative, but let me explain.

Imagine that you are a fluffy puppy living with your owner. (A little weird I know… but stay with my train of thought!) You may be an animal but you will still feel stress and anxiety; for instance, you may feel stressed if you need to go for a wee but your owner won’t let you out. You will feel stress if your owner goes to the local shop, or if your food bowl is empty.

This stress is similar to the stress that humans feel, but there is one key difference; when an animal feels stress it is easy to solve the problem quickly. If they are hungry they will find food, if they are thirsty they will find water – and if they need to go to the toilet, then they will!

For the puppy that is the end of the stressful situation. This is because animals live in a world where it is easy to quickly deal with stress, as it is linked to survival. This was the same for humans for most of our evolution – you felt hungry, you felt stressed, you found some food and the stress disappeared.

This means that stress once helped us to survive.

However modern life isn’t that simple. Most of the things that cause you stress are long term issues, such as worrying about your career, relationships and family problems. It can take years to form a good career, and therefore it is very difficult to stop worrying about it.

Most of the choices that we make won’t immediately relieve our stress; if you want a good career you will have to study hard, apply for jobs and wait to hear if you have an interview. If you want to be financially secure in the future, you can’t spend a day saving and then be done – you must spend your whole life saving and spending responsibly.

This makes it a lot harder for humans to de-stress, but there is still something that you can do to relieve stress; you can measure your progress in tiny chunks.

If you are worried about starting a good career, make the effort to apply improve your resume today. If you are worried about your finances, ring a financial adviser today. These small steps will help your brain to de-stress as it will help to remove the uncertainty from the situation.

If you are feeling stressed right now, think about what you can do today to relieve that stress. It may only be something small, but it will help you to sleep easier tonight. : )

Back From My Unplanned Blogging Break…

Hello fellow WordPressers! You may (or may not) have noticed that I haven’t blogged for about two months. It wasn’t a planned break, but life got very hectic – I moved house, I started a new job, and I found a new housemate.

I also started doing more work for one of the companies that I write for – the picture for this post is some filming we were doing for our YouTube channel. Very exciting – but it has been a very busy few months!

Thankfully my schedule is finally returning to normal… so I can finally return to a normal blogging schedule.

I’m really, really happy to be back to blogging life. I’m currently sat in my front room writing this blog post with a cup of tea, and the room is filled with the glorious spring sunlight. I’m going to write a blog post to publish later this week, and then I think I am going to take Holly (my 15 year old poodle) for a walk around the park. I’m looking forward to feeling the spring sun warming my face – and I’m sure Holly will enjoy stretching her legs while trying to eat the beautiful spring buttercups.

Anyway, that is all for now. The last thing I would like to do is thank you all for sticking with my blog even though I wasn’t posting consistently. I feel very lucky to be part of such a friendly and supportive blogging community! Look out for a blog post later this week – and then a new blog post every week after that!

ho

20 Fun Fall Activities

I promise this is my last fall blog post. Maybe. Probably. I just love fall so much! Lame, I know.

One of the best things about fall is all the fun activities that come with it. The weather may be getting colder, but that is no reason to spend the next few months inside. There are lots of awesome (and cheap) things that you can do outside during fall!

Don’t worry – there are inside activities too. I love spending time inside on a cold, dark evening, especially if I have a mug of hot chocolate.

Here are 20 fun fall activities.

  1. Go for a walk through a forest or a wood as the leaves change color.
  2. Go apple picking.
  3. Go to a fall festival with someone you love.
  4. Visit a pumpkin patch.
  5. Carve pumpkins.
  6. Make something with pumpkin in it. (My personal favorites are pumpkin bread and pumpkin pie.)
  7. Bundle up warm and go to kick leaves in your local park.
  8. Go to a corn maze with your friends or family.
  9. Visit a spooky fairground.
  10. Fly a kite with your children (or nephews and nieces).
  11. Light some candles or the fire and watch a movie during a cold evening.
  12. Make toffee apples.
  13. Make homemade soup.
  14. Pick pinecones.
  15. Eat breakfast in bed (mostly because it is far too cold to eat it at the table).
  16. Make a scarecrow.
  17. Make mulled wine.
  18. Make warm apple cider.
  19. Go antiquing.
  20. Go to a haunted house.

What are you going to do on this list? Let me know with a comment! 🙂

My blog post was republished on Thought Catalog!

Hey everyone!

My blog post “10 simple ways to become an improved version of yourself” has just been republished on Thought Catalog. It feels so nice to be acknowledged in this way! I am actually a full time-writer and editor but this blog is just a fun way for me to connect with other passionate people, and I never expected that one of my posts would be re-blogged. How exciting!!

If you want to check it out, here is the link! 🙂

10 Beautifully Simple Ways To Become The Best Version Of Yourself

Have a great day everyone!

2 EASY WAYS TO MAKE YOUR RESUME STAND OUT

Searching for a job is extremely tough. It involves a lot of work; crafting your resume, searching for job listings and online job boards, writing countless different cover letters, preparing for interviews and finally, interviewing.

If you are what to make sure that your resume stands out among the rest, check out two essential tips you should follow.

1. Show off your personality
It often seems like there are too many people and not enough jobs. Many people apply for hundreds of jobs without even securing an interview, which can feel demoralising and frustrating. Make sure your resume stands out by filling it with your personality. Include any volunteering or networking that you have done, and include some character in your cover letter. If you make the interviewer smile, they are much more likely to remember your resume later.

 

2. Take any advice you get

 

If you applied for a job and didn’t get the position, email the company to see if they can provide you with any feedback. It could only have been one thing on your resume that stopped you getting the job, and if you change that now, you are more likely to get hired later. Sometimes it can be hurtful getting constructive criticism, but remind yourself it is just that; it is constructive criticism, designed to help you improve.

 

Do you agree with this? Do you disagree? Let me know with a comment! I hope everyone is enjoying the new year!

We Debunk 5 Popular Myths About Working From Home

We Debunk 4 Common Myths About Working From Home

Do you work from home? If you do, you may have encountered these common myths about working from home. Here we debunk 4 of the most popular myths surrounding working from home.

The myth – There isn’t much money in working from home.

The truth – There are many legitimate websites offering jobs you can do from home, such as Odesk or Elance. The pay may not be great to start with, but if you work diligently and build up a portfolio, you can decide how much you want to charge. Being freelance means you can choose your own rates – but if they aren’t realistic, you may not get many clients.

The myth – It is difficult to stay focused while working from home.

The truth – It can always be difficult to focus on work, whether you work from home or in an office! If you have an office area you only use for work, getting dressed in the morning and sitting in your work space will often get the creative juices flowing. If you’re still struggle to focus, social media can be the devil – but most freelancers I know love their jobs too much to stay distracted for too long.

The myth – Most work from home jobs are scams.

The truth – There are thousands of scam jobs online – and thousands of legitimate jobs, too. Peopleperhour offers legitimate jobs, and you can find clients in your area who are willing to pay you real money for your work.

The myth – My clients won’t take me seriously if I work from home.

The truth – As long as the product you’re creating is good, your clients won’t care where you’re working from. It is very rare you will even discuss your working environment with clients – normally you will only discuss the work you are completing for them, just as you would in an office environment.

Do you work from home? What are the most common misconceptions about working from home that you have heard? Comment your suggestions below!

10 Tips For Hopeful Entrepreneurs

1. Make sure you care about your work. Running a business will take up all of your time and energy – if you don’t care about it, you will struggle to put enough effort in to see great results.

2. Hire a great team. If you are recruiting, make sure the people you hire have similar values to you as well as an excellent work ethic. It doesn’t matter if they have the qualifications on paper if you get the feeling they are disinterested in your business goals. Anyone can learn the skills, but you need someone with the same attitude as you.

3. Have a clear vision. If you want to become an entrepreneur, you will need to have a solid idea – swapping between different projects probably means they aren’t very good ideas. Once you have a clear vision, set out a clear plan on how to make it reality.

4. Put in the time. Success is rarely immediate – as Steve Jobs noted; “if you look closely, most overnight successes took a long time.” A hard working ethic is more likely to make you successful than a good idea.

5. Set goals. Where do you want to be in a year? How much money are you willing to invest? When do you want to start turning a profit? Setting goals will ensure you are working towards your dream every day.

6. Learn from your mistakes. Doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results is silly, so prepare to be flexible when you make mistakes. After all, each change is most likely to be an improvement.

7. Think about your customer. Don’t just create a product you think will be useful – think about who it will be useful to. Ask yourself ; who is your target audience? How old are they? How can you make your product appeal to them?

8. Ask your customers for feedback. Don’t assume you know what people what – ask them instead. Carefully listen to their answers, as they could be giving you advice that could make you millions!

9. Deliver more than expected. Don’t promise more than you can give; this will just leave people feeling dissatisfied and unhappy. Instead, deliver more than expected to guarantee happy customers.

10. Spend wisely. This may seem obvious, but budget for mistakes and try to save money wherever you can.

Yesterday - A Day In The Life Of A Freelancer

Yesterday – A Day In The Life Of A Freelancer

Hey everyone! I thought I’d do a bit of a different blog post today; a day in the life of me! When I tell people I am a freelance writer, I get all kinds of questions about what I do each day – mainly from people who assume my life is much more exciting than it is.

So here is a fairly boring account of yesterday. Behold – the very normal life of a freelance writer! I hope you enjoy it. 🙂

6AM – My alarm goes off and I switch it off. I roll over and pull my trusty laptop into bed with me. I switch it on and log onto my email; 16 emails – 7 spam messages, 5 messages about current writing projects, 3 emails from my transcription client, and one super important email about a future project. I reply to all of the messages that are not spam.

6.30AM – I jump in the shower and loudly listen Aerosmith’s album 9 Lives. I always listen to music in the shower to wake myself up. I’m not sure if this actually works though, as I trip over the bathmat mid-yawn.

I make a cup of tea and sit down at the desk in my bedroom.

7AM – I start transcribing audio files for my client’s family history book. I love transcribing the files – it is so cool to listen to his family’s conversations and slowly piece together their history. I like transcribing – I think it is peaceful and time passes quickly without me even realizing.

10AM – time to make a second – much needed – cup of tea and actually get some breakfast. I settle for Marmite on toast and a glass of orange juice. I take this through to my desk and continue transcribing until 12pm.

12PM– Lunch time! The best time of the day. Sometimes I go for a run or a swim, but at the moment I’m reading Gone Girl for the first time. I love the writing style, and so I sit in the back garden and read for half an hour.

12.30PM – I make myself a bean burger with spinach and seasoned chips, and take into the back garden. Delicious… Although the pages of Gone Girl are now marked with bean burger smudges.

1PM – It is such a beautiful day, so I decide to take my laptop in the back garden with me and work from there. It is quite hard to see the screen, but totally worth it for the possible tan I could get. I start writing an article for Lifehack about avocados – yeah, you heard. I love avocados and I have a lot to say about them! 😉

2PM – I’m starting to feel quite warm and sleepy. I take a Facebook break to see what my sisters are up to. I won’t be on for more than 10 minutes – I just want to see if there are any cute new pictures of my niece.

4PM – Uh oh. Probably time to log off Facebook.

4.30PM – Seriously – Do some work! I log out of Facebook and go downstairs to make a cup of tea. I need to write a lifestyle article for The Rich Daily before I finish today, so I start to think of a good angle for my piece. I am still mulling over this in the kitchen at 4.15PM when my housemate arrives home.

5PM – I had a catch up with my housemate, and now I am locked in my bedroom. I can hear her listening to to music and dancing in the kitchen – Must. Resist. Temptation. To. Go. Downstairs. I put on a relaxing acoustic album and start writing.

6.10PM – Finished! Now I can go downstairs and – Wait, I should really check my emails. It’s been a while.

6.15PM – 11 new emails?! Okay…

6.57PM – Aaaand…sent. Time to pour a glass of white wine and dance around the kitchen to loud music with my housemate.

11PM – Wait…. Did I reply to the email about a past writing project? I should go check.

11.03pm – No I didn’t. Better do that now.

What did you guys think of this post? I might do similar posts again, when I have more interesting days, such as days when I interview people or hire people. Let me know if any of you would find that interesting – or anything else you would like to see me blogging about!

Have a great day everyone 🙂